What are some NPCs you have created in the RCR?
I want to see!
You want Stats? I don't have many stats.
I have ideas and descriptions. Would you find those fun to read?
Jay ~meow!~
Group Name: Malovids
Created by: Garry Stahl and Jay P Hailey
Appearance: Malovids resemble humanoid sheep. They have a coat of fur.
Number of Members: Some billions, a home world and a handful of colonies.
Nature of Members: Member of the Malovid species
Organization: An empire - when encountered usually as a military group or a raiding band.
Game Role: Low level orcs, sillyness.
World Role: Angry sheep people.
Relative Influence: Slight - any of the big Galactic powers could defeat the Malovids - taking them out of the "Great Game" would be more difficult.
Public or Secret?: Public, although they have secret operations.
Publicly Stated Goal: To conquor the hated arrogant monkies and prove their natural superiority.
Relative Wealth: Compared to an Individual huge, they can afford war fleets.
Compared to other galactic players, on the small side.
Group advantages: Malovids can be *mean* and sometimes inventively so. The Malovids are prone to actions which are not entirely suited to individual survival - when properly manipulated this can lead to Malovids counter attacking against superior odds and making suicide attacks.
Special Abilities: The Malovids are generally willing to go to the maximum
extent to win their battles.
Group disadvantages: The Malovids as a whole are slightly below average in terms of intelligence.
Special disadvantages: The Malovid pop culture reeks with resement and
anger. The Malovids know, they just know that humans are out to get them, and are, in turn out to get humans and to prove to everyone that they are just as good as any human empire.
Malovid popular speakers and entertainment hosts use the most drooling
idiocy and illogic to pander to and maintain this ugly resentment. The
Malovids eat it up.
Many Malovids are willing to fight and suffer for this. Dying usually comes
as an ugly surprise.
Those who favor them: Malovids. People who can manipulate the Malovids for their own uses.
Those opposed to them: Humans who don't like getting shot. People who
think peace is a good idea.
Area of Operation: The Galaxy, off in a backwater somewhere
Headquarters Location: The Superior Pastures of Malovidia. "It's plain that
the Monkies are jealous of the superior quality of the grass of our home
world, my friends! They seek to to pave over our lovely world with their
cities, factories and herds of oppressed cattle. There's no reasoning with
these people, My Friends!"
Public Face: Angry Sheep people
Notable Members:
Harold - the first emperor of the Malovids - remmbered as the most violent, angry and intelligent of the Malovids so far. The Evil Empire motif of the Malovid Empire is pretty much Harold's Invention.
Treemac - the Current Emperor, gives Harold a run for his money in the
smart and mean department. Surrounded by mean sycophants
Slow Hardbranch - the most popular of a veritable herd of rabble rousers.
His melodious voice gives his insanity a surface appearance of credibility,
and that's enough for most Malovids. He set the tone for idiotic
rationalizations about the evil of "The Monkies". He is known for rampant
drug addiction, occasional bouts of debauchery with young ewes and being cringinly subservient and worshipful of Emperor Treemac.
History of the Organization:
some time in the past - someone makes a race of sheep people, then abandons them on a planet that's nicely suited to them. Many people would like to meet these ancient progenitors and slap the crap out of them.
more recently - contact with the malovids leads to them being just one more of the thundering horde of alien and near-human spacies wandering around the galaxy.
about 100 years ago - attemps by Malovids to modernize their world meet with mixed success.
about 50 years ago - Harold returns from a stint with some military force
somewhere, with a very solid set of evil ideas.
about 40 years ago - Harold establishes himself as Harold the 1st - Emperor of Malovidia.
About 35 years ago - the Malovids reveal an actual space fleet and space
warfare capacity by quickly conquering the Tamile, a race of stone age
sentient slugs.
About 25 years ago - The Malovids conflict with the Corellians over looting
rights of a primitive human world. The Corellians appeal to pro-human
prejudice during this campaign. This sets the Malovids OFF. The Malovids
are equipped by Alderaanian rivals of the Corellians. The Alderaanians can
barely keep from snickering, durring such back room deals - which just sets the Malovids off worse.
About 23 years ago - The Battle of Gantooine. In a savage attempt to
rewrite the rules of the Correllian/Malovid war, the Malovids launch a full
scale invsion of Gantooine. The fact that Gantoonie has been independant of Corellia for centuries seems to make no impression whatever on the Malovids. The Malovids quickly gain the upper hand but are swamped by guerilla fighters, mercenaries, pirates and partisans.
20 years ago -the relief of Gantooine - Corellian and Coruscanti forces
counter attack the Malovids destroying their fleet at Gantooine, routing
their armies and generally serving up a lot of Mutton.
Ever since Malovid pirates have been a concern, but the Malovid war machine largely stays out of the way of the big players.
However the Malovid resentments are growing....
Fate of the Organization: Just another group of power mad loonies in the
mix.
Flying Sheep
by Monty Python
-----------------------------------------
The cast:
TOURIST
Terry Jones
SHEPHERD
Graham Chapman (With a thick countrysid accent)
VOICE OVER
Eric Idle
----------------------------------------
The sketch:
(Opening Scene : A tourist dressed in a business suit approaches a shepherd.
The sounds of sheep and the outdoors are heard.)
Tourist: Good afternoon.
Shepherd: Afternoon
Tourist: Ah, lovely day isn't it?
Shepherd: Eh, 'tis that.
Tourist: You here on holiday?
Shepherd: Nope, I live 'ere.
Tourist: Oh, good for you. Uh...those ARE sheep aren't they?
Shepherd: Yeh.
Tourist: Hmm, thought they were. Only, what are they doing up in the trees?
Shepherd: A fair question and one that in recent weeks 'as been much on my
mind. It's my considered opinion that they're nestin'.
Tourist: Nesting?
Shepherd: Aye.
Tourist: Like birds?
Shepherd: Exactly. It's my belief that these sheep are laborin' under the
misapprehension that they're birds. Observe their be'avior. Take for a start
the sheeps' tendency to 'op about the field on their 'ind legs. Now witness
their attmpts to fly from tree to tree. Notice that they do not so much fly
as...plummet.
(Baaa baaa... flap flap flap... whoosh... thud.)
Tourist: Yes, but why do they think they're birds?
Shepherd: Another fair question. One thing is for sure, the sheep is not a
creature of the air. They have enormous difficulty in the comparatively
simple act of perchin'. (Baaa baaa... flap flap flap... whoosh... thud.)
Trouble is, sheep are very dim. Once they get an idea in their 'eads,
there's no shiftin' it.
Tourist: But where did they get the idea?
Shepherd: From Harold. He's that most dangerous of creatures, a clever
sheep. 'e's realized that a sheep's life consists of standin' around for a
few months and then bein' eaten. And that's a depressing prospect for an
ambitious sheep.
Tourist: Well why don't just remove Harold?
Shepherd: Because of the enormous commercial possibilities if 'e succeeds.
A friend of mine described encountering these guys in a D&D game and I was hooked.
Short, green, greedy, amoral, cowardy, and deeply unclear on whatever it is that you're screaming about.
These guys in an over armed transport are lost. They just want to get home.
But they have stepped on the wrong toes, and now any people are chasing them, and the PCs with guns.
They're not stupid, they just don't care about your priorities, which leads to some interesting miss-communication.
Their ship is named S.T.R. Which is an acronym for "Shiny Thing Raider"
it helps to GM these guys if you can do a funny/annoing high pitchedd squeaky voice.
The only one with a name so far is "Binky" who is named, spoken of and mourned for his absence. Binky was off the ship getting an ice-cream cone at the local "13,000 flavors" when the mooks attacked. he watched his ship fly off into the sky and said "Well, crap."
His crew assumes he has been captured and roughly violated by angry mooks with guns.
'i needed a random bounty mission for my players so i used the first thing that came to my mind a Smuggler that was on the run from the empire his name Bendo Vai'R (say it out lound if you dont get it :P)
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