One Geek to Another - IC Relationships and OOC Pressure

**Farcaster** · 10-05-2009, 10:55 AM

Dear One Geek,

I have an In Character relationship with a fellow player. That is to say, their character and mine have a romantic (and sexual) relationship in the game we're playing. It's an aspect of the game I'm enjoying, and we always "fade to black" (saying things like "and they go and have their fun" and then picking the role play back up after the encounter) rather than detailing out our character's intimate interactions.

Lately, however, the other player has been trying to push that boundary to be Out of Character as well. I'm not interested in a "real life" relationship with this person, but I also don't want to cause huge issues with our gaming group or offend this person who I consider a friend.

How do I deal with that?

Signed,
Keeping It In Character]

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**LuckyCharms** · 10-05-2009, 04:42 PM

well, sounds like you making it overcomplicated... if the other player is trying to make it out of game then they probably think that your way of showing them affection or flirting with them is by doing so in game. you have really three options if you don't want to have a relationship out of game. either tell the dm and see if you can solve it through him, end the in-game relationship and make another one with a different character(makes an interesting twist in rp), or, probably the best idea, confront the other player out of game sit them down and tell them that you just want to be friends, after that it's up to them to not make an issue, and if they do then they're just being immature and your group may be better off without them. feel free to ask me anything anytime and hope it goes well.