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Ashene

"Gamer Chicks" and Romance in RPG's.

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Well, this is a random rant I don't know many of you will want to read but I just have to get it off of my chest.

This has to do with the general subject of romance in role playing. Most of the role playing I've done has had a bit of romance in it and some innocent flirting which is fine. Though it never was the primary focus, it gave an interesting twist to the plot and me being a romantic, I had a blast with it.

There have been games where there has been a whorish type character who flirts with ALL of the guys in the roleplay and seems to have absolutely every intention to steal every male character for herself and nobody can have any fun or get in any sort of attempt at even talking to the opposite gender because then there would obviously be the proverbial "Cat fight" between the people playing the characters. "He's mine...no he's mine...and he's mine...and he's mine too...wait...they're ALL mine and you can't have them...*hairpulltugscratchhiss*..." etc...

The way I play my characters and the way I see other females play their characters seem like night and day. I'm more the type to be shy and polite and I tend to have characters that gravitate towards the outcasts in the group. There haven't been many characters that I've played that have been overtly flirty.

It irks me to no end where female characters flit from man to man flirting and showing skin and acting like they'd sleep with any man right then and there.

I really wish that there was a happy medium in the role play games I'm in that allowed for some innocent flirting and perhaps have a chance to find something in common with a male character and see where things go from there. Innocent flirting is nice but when someone is blatantly showing skin and giving everyone the impression that they're "easy" then that's the type of character I tend to think has no real sense of the plot or quest at hand and has only one thing on the brain, and it isn't spell preparation or combat strategy.

Everything is good in moderation, and there happens to be a good deal of things that I'd tolerate in a roleplay but if a character is being overly flirtatious and not really giving any other thoughts to the task at hand...it makes me question their intent to join the rp in the first place.

I guess I'm personally just looking for a game where I can have fun, not where I need to compete for a male character's attention. If I get it, I get it...I don't need to have my characters "Assets" showing in plain view to give the impression she's interested in them.

Characters who get caught up in too much battle is one thing but way too much flirting is detrimental to the plot and leaves the other people feeling small and insignificant.

*le sigh*

That's all for now...maybe I'll be able to find my happy medium soon. I'm not holding out much hope but perhaps there is something out there for me that holds what I'm looking for.

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  1. Sascha's Avatar
    I'd like to say I've never played a super-flirt, but ... there was a DnD bard who fit the description. Sort of. She'd flirt a lot, but rarely take it farther than that. And you'd never see her get into fights over men. (The other female PC in that campaign wasn't flirty at all, 'cept for the session where I first joined.)

    Course, now I'm curious how that type of player would fare in, say, Primetime Adventures, as opposed to the majority of games. Lots of television shows have the tramp-type character, though whether that's a good thing to emulate or not is up for debate
  2. russdm's Avatar
    Its interesting to me that alot of male players will play their female characters like how you say. They will be showing off the "assets(sp?)" and be interested in sleeping with anybody. I found it weird and incrediably strange, because no real female would act like that ever.

    Now, a female character that sometimes shows off her "assets" and flirts, I can understand. But annoyingly, male players do it in a way like thats how they are all the time.

    Its really annoying.
  3. TwoGunBob's Avatar
    Funny thing is, the most romantic, using that term soooo loosely, I can remember being in was White Wolf's Freak Legion and Jackie Just was an androgynous enticer so it all made sense in context to the game.
    Epic romance or just amorous skullduggery were never much in the themes early in my gaming experiences and latyer when girls played in various groups it was... all business. Of course it was perpetually White Wolf games with more political power plays than the love of the undead/pack/fettering/what have you's.
    Course as a group we didn't cross gender play often as russdm mentioned, it was shallow playing and often a cardboard cut-out of what might be perceived as a single aspect of a female.
    Course the dynamic of female characters in teh game led to more acts of derring-do that were usually crippled by horrendous dice rolls and botches that were really laughable and oft resulted in the "I'm going to save you!!!" turning into the female in distress saying "After I'm done saving myself, I'll save you as well oh great knight clad in shining armor who just shot himself in the foot and tripped on his own klaive." Fickle, fickle dice gods.
  4. Sascha's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by russdm
    I found it weird and incrediably strange, because no real female would act like that ever.
    There are women out there who do, in fact, behave this way; their image is made "popular" by sensationalist media, and disseminated across the culture at large. (My ex acted just a few hairs below this extreme, and flirted with just about anybody. Her wardrobe wasn't entirely stripperific, though.)

    It could be this portrayal of women is the root of a lot of the way some men portray female characters, both in fiction and in gaming. Which is why the behavior is criticized, as it's not a very good representation of women as a whole. (Another, maybe more common, cause would be in the scope of wish fulfillment; "she does this, because it's what I would do as a girl" thinking.)
  5. Arkhemedes's Avatar
    I agree Sascha. One thing that has to be kept in mind in all of this, is that most rpgs are fantasy. We play characters that are not representative of the norm for a reason. Seriously, how many of us out there have ever played the average Joe and Jane? These characters, even in an rpg heavy on romance are dull and uninspiring.

    We prefer to play heroes instead and other people we can only dream about (or fantasize about). And a female character with little or no inhibitions, for both male and female players would be high on that list, though perhaps not everyone's cup of tea.
  6. templeorder's Avatar
    I've never played any (recent - hey, cheesy days of 20 years ago don't count!) female characters like that. This is one of those where if you find the right group, "all will be well". I have a group of players that can handle that no problem. We have occasional gurl gamers drop in and most have not done it, though some have to be amusing... its never been overboard (except once - though it fit the character, a ruthless, powerhungry magus that would use everything at her disposal to gain control and power around her) and i myself am playing a female character now and i actively try and avoid the stereotypical guy gamer use of women characters... i think i do it ok, most in the party do not even factor it in...