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"Gamer Chicks" - The Squeaquel

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LOL Just kind of "borrowed" the title from Alvin and the Chipmunks' new movie title...I really have no desire to go see it. Loved the cartoon though.

I find that even though I try to bring romance and fun into an rp, as a balance to the intense hack and slash happening, and no matter how much my characters attempt negotiations with NPC's, they tend to be ignored, by the players or even the GM.

The dice-rolling system in the chat room has not been kind to me...and I admit it's frustrating at times to know that one bad roll can change your fate from being at full hp to being dead in a couple of hurts every time I see myself roll a 1, for any reason.

As a female gamer, I am not opposed to fighting or it is the point of the game. Not a lot of the GM's I've had have allowed the amount of role playing that I like in a game, and very few have succeeded in keeping my interest.

If a PC or an NPC has any sort of interest in the character I play, I am all for starting the romance. My characters never have the intention of diving into an intensely sexual relationship right off the bat anyway...and if they is up to both parties. Though I have never had romance dominate in any sort of D&D setting, I find it brings a bit more depth to characters, rather than having "tunnel vision" and hack-and-slash all the time.

When someone blatantly ignores what I say and how my character reacts to things...I recently had a character start cutting her fingers one by one because I was testing the GM and the other see if they were actually paying any attention to what I was doing.

My character simply wanted to be asked what was wrong by the NPC who was interested in her, as she had been rethinking their acceptance of the mission they were on simply by the fact that she didn't want to accept gold for an evil deed.

Needless to say that ordeal is finished, but it really bothers me how GM's have no respect for girls as roleplayers and they never seem to know how to react to anything I have to say...and it would have been nice of the GM to let me know ahead of time what his plans were with the character so that my character wouldn't react the way she did.

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I was merely reacting.

There's nothing like a balance between battle and roleplay and if romance is thrown in there...great, if not...that's great too...I love to have fun. I was clearly not having any fun simply because there was no freedom to role play. It was all ROLL play and this was pretty much the straw that broke the camel's back.

Sorry for the rant, but romance isn't always a bad thing in an RP. If people hate it they should be up front about it with people, and if there is any indication of it at the start...I believe it adds to a rp and makes it more interesting rather than battling every few minutes and rolling perception, perception, initiative...etc...and waiting for your turn for battle which seems to NEVER come when you're a woman.

I am a patient person, and apparently other people don't seem to be. If I took thirty seconds to a minute before I make a decision as to what I'm name or my character's name pops up on the screen with a question mark. I don't think it is polite for someone to expect lightning reflexes. Also for someone with little to no experience with the game is a bit hesitant about what she can do and needs a minute or so to see what she's capable of doing without getting herself killed.

Am I wrong for liking a bit of romance, or asking the GM to be patient while I think about what to do? Not having played the game and wanting to try a new system out, one would hope the GM would be happy to help me out, right? This particular one hardly gave any help and rushed through the making of one of my characters (who died a few sessions later anyway) and assumed I knew much more than I actually did. In this case I had mentioned I never played before...and he still allowed me to join in.

It could have been our styles clashed and the large sizes of the groups could have been what had caused my decisions to be delayed. I often found myself lost and disoriented and not really sure what would be best to do. The best thing that happened was when the game ended.

I think that the next time I play this particular style of RP, that I find a GM that suits my style of play rather than someone who expects too much from you.


This might be my last entry but who knows, I might have something else to say...maybe a bit more positive than this one.


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  1. cplmac's Avatar
    Though the character that Ashene is speaking of isn't the one that she is playing in my "Destiny of Kings" game, her character and another are sweet on each other. Yes the characters will exchange a kiss with each other, and do look out for one another, the characters aren't constantly jumping into bed with each other either. It is because of the non combat role playing that Ashene and the other player do with thier characters that actually gets them extra XP when I award the points for that particular game session.

    Yes, I have seen times where other folks have done what Ashene is saying about putting up a player's name with a question mark. Now I will admit that I will type a player's name and let them know that it is thier turn. What gets me is when someone is typing a response to what was asked or happened to thier character and you see what Ashene has said about the name with a question mark. Then that persons post comes up and it is blatantly obvious that it took more than 15 to 30 seconds to be able to type out the response to the scenerio. Now if there has been about 5 to 10 minutes go by, then you may be needing to inquire. There other thing that some folks don't seem to take into consideration is that maybe that person is PMing with the DM/GM as to if they can have thier character do something or has a question about a particular action.
  2. Arkhemedes's Avatar
    Ashene, you might consider giving pbp's a try, as they are usually 80 to 90% role playing as opposed to roll playing, no one is ever trying to hurry you (you can take all the time you want to consider your actions and say what it is you want to say) and in the ones I'm involved in there is most definitely romance. On the down side, of course, pbp's move at a much slower pace than live rpg's. But it's a nice game to have on the side.
  3. templeorder's Avatar
    Romance is a plot that works well with a good group of gamers. I'll pull the cliche card here though and says a majority of gamers are nerds, dweebs, geeks, etc. - socially immature in many ways. This makes it hard to handle well in, unless the GM themselves assists in treating it right. And 90% of my group is married and/or above 30 and its handled maturely and with taste. When a girl comes in we don't change anything initially but warn them and find out what are the limits of propriety and taste and adjust over time. On the time issue, thats just something you need to tell people about.. but i don't think 30-60 seconds is unreasonable at all. There are times when i expect a fast decision - combat does not give you time to ask questions or analyze in depth... but even then i allow perception checks and am willing to let players get their bearings. Considering the time wasted in jokes, movie quotes, and dramatic flair, 30-60 seconds seems cheap, especially if the end result is good character experience.

    In terms of expectations, its not "too much" - its just different. Its not right or wrong, its just a question of, as you said, finding a group that suits your style.