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Wiptag

The Silent Disappointment

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I have returned from the gaming group I met, and unfortunately, things did not go well.

I was ready - spending hours on writing down what I was going to say and hooking up my new printer so I could have the seven pages I put together on me, but it turned out my friend neglected to tell the group that I was coming, much less why I was coming. I wasn't given an opportunity to talk about my games, except for explaining to the owner of the house why I was there, which didn't seem to go over with the Game Master, who acted territorial. On top of all of this, I sat on the floor while four dogs and three cats made me their closest of friends. After an hour, I figured I wasn't going to get a chance to speak and headed out, leaving with my friend the pages I had worked so hard on, which will probably be used as scratch paper. My cat is very excited about all the smells I apparently now have.

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  1. jpatterson's Avatar
    uh.

    wow man. That sucks, you were really looking forward to that. I've not put that much work into a "presentation" but I've had that kind of enthusiasm for sharing even just one game with a group and no one would even consider it or listen to me try to get them to try it; simply would not entertain the thought of it at all. Yours though was just not getting a chance to talk at all whatsoever.

    maybe you could point them to an online presentation or something, so they could check out your stuff at their leisure? They might each then be able to visit at their own convenience and choosing, rather than under the captainship of the GM of that night, and also not feel like they were being "lecture" if that was part of a problem, which I don't know if it was.
  2. Wiptag's Avatar
    Being lectured was something I was worried about, but as I never got a chance to speak at all, it definitely wasn't an issue last night. I laugh now about how I worried that I'd talk too much.

    Yes, I did have high expectations. I had met some of them before at a local bar (my friend's idea, as I don't usually go to bars), and I thought having a friend who was in the gaming group at least gave me some kind of in. I never thought I'd be forced to sit on the floor among several animals. That was unreal and pretty much a "get lost" message I tried to ignore because I had put so much into this.

    That's what gets to me - they may have considered it or they may not have, and I was prepared for either outcome. What I wasn't prepared for was not being allowed to talk at all. The GM looked at me like I was a dog playing the piano when I asked him a question about his game, yet remained silent. I couldn't even break the ice with that guy. I was completely shut down, and when the GM shuts you down, the group shuts you down, because apparently, there exists a group of adults who succumb to peer pressure as if they were still in high school. It was a big, fat waste of time.

    Like I said, I left my presentation with my friend, and if they caught why I was there, some may read it. If I am asked to come back for whatever reason though, I'll be silent #8 who has to sit on the floor, and I'm not doing that. If something's going to happen with them, then they will have to meet me halfway, as I am not going to sit in a room with the stench of several animals and zero airflow. It's a bad sign when I immediately have to change clothes after I get home just for being in the room an hour. Even if they refused to clean their own space, there are many clean, public game areas in this city with tables and chairs that don't resemble a petting zoo.
    Updated 08-20-2010 at 04:02 PM by Wiptag
  3. Slipstream's Avatar
    It sounds like it was initially your friend's fault for not informing the GM you were coming. He should of first asked if you could come, consulting the rest of the group, then got back to you. Unexpected people showing up does throw the awkward wrench in though. I know how that goes, but the GM treating you as underclass is very much into douchebag territory. Even if you were invited back, I'd reject it unless you got a personal apology from everybody, which it sounds like you probably won't.
  4. kirksmithicus's Avatar
    I just don't get this type of behavior. RPG's are a social activity, but all to often gamers seem to be rather anti-social when it comes to new people. The group that I currently play with is a bit like this unfortunately. I however, am not, I am very social and love talking to people (probably annoyingly so). I also DM, and I would have had you making a character and jumping right in.

    I have to agree with Slipstream and say that the DM sounds like a real piece of work. If I were you, I'd see about finding some other people.
  5. jpatterson's Avatar
    Agreed. Apparently these people have a secret infinite stash of available gamers that the rest of us do not have access to, to be able to treat people like that. Must be nice.

    I don't know what to think about ever going back whether invited or not, about an apology or not. On one hand, it was really up to them, and if that's the way they are, that's the way they are and I'd probably not want to be around people like that to begin with. On the other hand, to expect an apology for something that may not have been wholly intentional might also be a bit much and might risk being able to participate if you did want to go back. That's kind of an iffy one to me. I'd probably make sure somehow they were pre-introduced to you and made to understand your proposition or sent to your site or blog or you were asked to email them your general idea or something, first, so there would be no ambiguity, before any more talk of another meeting with that group. But first impression-wise, very unfortunate and that group is not among any of the top picks no matter how much I longed to game.
  6. Fred Lang's Avatar
    After all that, I'm guessing that you're breathing a sigh of relief that you don't have to play with such a passive-aggressive little poisoned group, right?

    Really, you seem like a nice person. Don't assume you're the problem...sounds like they are decidedly un-fun anyway.

    :-)
  7. Malachi57's Avatar
    I agree with Slitpstream. If the GM was really like that then he's definitely in douchebag territory. And the whole thing about having to sit on the floor is sad. They're called chairs. Buy some. And don't even get me started on the wild kingdom this guy apparently had running around his place. That's probably why he couldn't afford an extra chair, he's too busy buying dog and cat food. I wouldn't go back just because of that, but then again, I'm a people person, not an animal lover.
  8. Blond Gamer Girl's Avatar
    Sorry to hear about such a bad experience. I would definitely not return to that game. Camping chairs on sale cost $10 - what an investment.

    To prevent a next time, I suggest meeting with the group before hand. From my past experiences, I ask these questions: Do you have adequate space? Is it air conditioned? Is there parking available? That's all before we get to the game questions. It's sad that we share similar experiences that requires us to ask these questions.