PDA

View Full Version : New Adventure: The Spire of the Raven God



warwizard
05-07-2008, 05:48 AM
http://www.rpgnow.com/index.php?filters=0_0_0&manufacturers_id=2346

My friend Joe Calkins and I have posted our first combined effort online at www.onebookshelf.com

The Spire of the Raven God is a fantasy adventure for those who run d20 games. Please do check out the full preview and see if you want to add this to your collection.

We are doing a series based in our world, Hanan Pacha (Higher world) that involves a lot of good vs evil scenarios, dungeons to explore and traveling encounters. We even have side jaunts into the outer planes.

Rex Baker

tesral
05-07-2008, 09:03 AM
http://www.rpgnow.com/index.php?filters=0_0_0&manufacturers_id=2346

My friend Joe Calkins and I have posted our first combined effort online at www.onebookshelf.com (http://www.onebookshelf.com)

The Spire of the Raven God is a fantasy adventure for those who run d20 games. Please do check out the full preview and see if you want to add this to your collection.

We are doing a series based in our world, Hanan Pacha (Higher world) that involves a lot of good vs evil scenarios, dungeons to explore and traveling encounters. We even have side jaunts into the outer planes.

It looks like an intresting jaunt.

A few pointers if I might:

Don't bother with game information in the introduction, the save of the Vrock's screech for example, it breaks the flow of the narrative. I do like that you outline the flow of the plot in the introduction.

I personally am more likely to buy a product I can drop into my own world with ease. While I think you have a wonderfully creative world, how much of your cosmology have you written into the adventure that I have to change? Will I end up rewriting the whole thing? At which point, why did I buy it?

Layout: simplify. backgrounds behind the text are bad. I'm going to print this out if I use it. Don't cost me twice as much in ink or toner as I paid for it in the first place. Also, not every printer is created equally. That beautiful layout could result in unreadable mud. Result; someone unlikely to buy you next product. While I like art, your layout is not what I am buying, it's the content I am after. Keep the content clear.

warwizard
05-08-2008, 06:59 PM
Don't bother with game information in the introduction, the save of the Vrock's screech for example, it breaks the flow of the narrative. I do like that you outline the flow of the plot in the introduction.

Valuable information and I hope I can remember this the next time.

I personally am more likely to buy a product I can drop into my own world with ease. While I think you have a wonderfully creative world, how much of your cosmology have you written into the adventure that I have to change? Will I end up rewriting the whole thing? At which point, why did I buy it?

If you skip the mention of Hanan Pacha and insert one of your temperate forests for Elleron, you can use the module as is. I don't get into the cosmology of the world itself, except in the intro for the DM.
Everything is D20 compliant, it features a journey to the plane where demons roam, the rescue of a wizard who has an important new spell, combat in the forests and the rocky spire/dungeon.

Layout: simplify. backgrounds behind the text are bad. I'm going to print this out if I use it. Don't cost me twice as much in ink or toner as I paid for it in the first place. Also, not every printer is created equally. That beautiful layout could result in unreadable mud. Result; someone unlikely to buy you next product. While I like art, your layout is not what I am buying, it's the content I am after. Keep the content clear.

My artist likes to create! :D He did the interior mostly in greyscale, any or all can be printed in black and white and you can lop off the d20 stuff and last page cover art!
I do see what you are saying though. We need to simplify the next project in order to (potentially) increase sales.

We just finished our first mini-adventure and posted it this morning. Thanks for the valuable feedback and your care in helping us out!

Rex

tesral
05-08-2008, 10:02 PM
If you skip the mention of Hanan Pacha and insert one of your temperate forests for Elleron, you can use the module as is. I don't get into the cosmology of the world itself, except in the intro for the DM.
Everything is D20 compliant, it features a journey to the plane where demons roam, the rescue of a wizard who has an important new spell, combat in the forests and the rocky spire/dungeon.


Then say so up front, bottom of the blurb kind of thing. "This adventure easily adapted to any Campaign setting with a temperate forest." This is information that will help me with my decision to buy.

I obviously have not read the adventure through, and while you do provide much more information that most (I hated the old TSR pig in a shrink wrapped poke modules).one doesn't read the whole thing before buying. Get me with the description. Things I look for pretty much in order.

It is something I can drop into my world?

Is it the kind of thing my players will enjoy?

Is it of the level I am currently looking for? (Less important by far. Adventures keep)

Last if you have something about the module that say requires that certain abilities or classes are along for the ride, put that in as well. "Needs a Paladin in the party" That is a deal breaker if the party doesn't have a paladin. Knowing that ahead of time aids in making an informed decision.

The main reason that I buy a pre packaged adventures is that DMs and players get to know each other. Other peoples' work breaks the pattern, it gives me a new head to think out of. It at minimum gives me new ideas to use.